Lupe Fiasco Wedgied

Following a performance last night at the Key Arena in Seattle, Washington, rapper and self-described “nerd” Lupe Fiasco was reportedly the victim of a vicious wedgie. Fiasco, real name Wasalu Muhammad Jaco, was in town for the opening night of Kanye West’s “Glow in the Dark” tour, which also featured performances by R&B star Rihanna (the poor man's Beyonce), and genre bending rap/rock group N.E.R.D (commonly referred to among hip hop fans as “Pharrell and those other tools”).

According to sources close to the rapper, shortly after leaving the stage he was confronted by two men described as “mean bullies.” The two men allegedly confronted the rapper, calling him names and questioning his gender before tossing his rhyme notebook into a nearby puddle. The two men then yanked up the rapper’s underwear waistband in a maneuver commonly referred to as a “wedgie.”

When reached for comment, a shaken and tearful Fiasco told Murder4Life, “Those guys are jerks! I was just minding my business and these guys just came and picked on me.” While the rapper did not threaten retribution for the bullying, he did vow to “tell Kanye” about the incident.

Lupe Fiasco, a Chicago-based rapper and probable virgin rose to fame after appearing on Kanye West’s hit single “Touch the Sky.” While his records have not faired well in the commercial marketplace, he has been able to gain some notoriety as an “intelligent rapper.” The "intelligent" classification is due in large part to the recent popularity of hip hop hailing from the Southern portion of America. Southern hip-hop, known primarily for its crude boastfulness and graphic references to genitalia, has set the bar for classifying hip hop as “intelligent” surprisingly low in recent years. This has allowed Lupe to retain the title of “intelligent rapper,” despite the fact that the subject matter of most of his songs center around the activities of friendless high school drop-outs, namely video games, cartoons and skateboarding.

The two suspects in the wedgie-ing remain at large and security officials for the “Glow in the Dark” tour are currently assessing whether additional security is required for future dates. Lupe has requested that his mother be flown out for his protection for the remainder of the tour.

Details of the attack remain sketchy and it was not known at press time whether the rapper was also the victim of an “Indian Burn” and whether the wedgie was of the normal variety or an “atomic wedgie.” The next tour stop for the “Glow in the Dark” tour is the ARCO Arena in Sacramento, California on Saturday night.

The "Glow In The Dark" tour mixtape featuring Lupe Fiasco is available for free download HERE.